Monday, November 22, 2010

All I have to offer

I don't know what the fuck I'm doing.

My mind spins. You made it spin. The way you looked straight into my eyes when the dam that held your emotions in broke down, letting the flood of feelings loose dumbfounded me. The simplicity of the words overwhelmed me. The purity of the moment cut me in half.

And I hate how I 'm unable to focus on anything. I hate how I keep second-guessing my own decisions. I hate how it doesn't seem to be enough that you already have your answer. Not enough for you. Not enough for me.

And you've set things in motion, this much is true. Things that I'd long forgotten existed. That I thought weren't even there. Or real.
And for that, I know I owe you.

But the passing of years upon years alone has taken its toll...

How can I convince my feet to walk on the ground when my mind is always in search of its place among the clouds?

How can I settle for the peaceful bubbling of the stream when every inch of me yearns for the wild, boisterous ocean?

How can I live in the light when the night keeps beckoning me?

How can I make do with what I have when my heart craves for so much more?

How can I ever stay, when I'm already gone?..

See, how I can't seem to tear my eyes off of the faraway horizon they're so firmly fixed on...

See, I can't spare one single glance to look at myself in the mirror.

I can't even look in your eyes for the fear of what I might find there; for fear of seeing the reflection of what I've become.

I never said it was fair. But this one truth is all I have to offer.

Tuesday, November 16, 2010

mood swings

who knows, who cares.

why my mind never seems to be able to rest for the slightest minute
why my feet tingle to spring, fists poised to strike
why my voice struggles for the scream to be heard
eyes ablaze to see

what an incomprehensible notion
life being this absurd conjunction of reality and dream
being trapped between half-truths and full lies

why does my existence ache to flee when I'm stranded here
why do my eyes gaze at the horizon like that's where I belong
how can I miss things I've never seen

perhaps I've met you in another lifetime, and the faded memory still haunts me.
maybe it's your distant whisper, carried with the cosmic winds over the ages, that I hear
I may have passed you by walking down the street and never knew it was you.
no... not likely. I would have known. I would have definitely known.

who knows, who cares
not even me.
especially not me.


I was sitting quietly at my desk when suddenly..



The monsters!
They came!
They want to take over the planet!

They are appalling. Slime covers their whole body.

They are examining the human race not through eyes, but through horrible antennas.

They can't be harmed. Their powerful armor repels every futile attempt of offense.

Monstrous! Deplorable!

We are utterly helpless in the face of total annihilation.

They are here.

They are...


Humans, prepare for battle. :P
Glory awaits!

Declaration of independence

Just because we hang out it doesn't mean you have a claim on me.

Just because you think highly of me it doesn't make me a saint.

Just because we've talked it doesn't mean you know me.

Just because we've walked a few steps together it doesn't mean we're on the same path.

Just because we think similarly doesn't mean we're meant for each other.

Just because I admire you it doesn't mean I dig you.

Just because you dig me it doesn't mean you own me.

Don't claim rights I haven't given you.
Don't jump into unjustified conclusions.

Don't think you can smother me without consequences.

Don't think I'll hesitate to disappear without a trace.

Sunday, November 14, 2010

Stone Rage

Save your rage for tomorrow, the elders wisely say.

But, alas, I've saved it for too long...